Fifty-two was quite a year. Before I started writing this post I took a quick peek at the post that I wrote last year. I knew I was headed for change and growth and I was making definite steps toward…well, what it was I wasn’t yet entirely sure. I had found a lot of my life that was no longer acceptable and had begun the process of shedding limiting beliefs and touching the edges of my comfort zone. But whether these changes that I felt coming would be internal or actual physical changes would depend on how well I would be able to integrate what I had learned in my sessions with Nicole.
Over the past 365 days, I dusted off parts of me that I had stowed away in order to function in a dysfunctional life. Although I have always prided myself on my strength and my resiliency, I promised myself that these important traits would no longer be what binds me to unhealthy situations. Instead, I vowed to employ my strength and resiliency to move beyond my comfort zone. To be guided by my curiosity, not my fear. To take risks, accepting with full grace and compassion that there will victories and failures (and valuable lessons in both).
And then I project managed the biggest project of my life. It wasn’t without stress and fear crept into the process at several points. But every time fear reared up and I thought about canceling everything, I remembered the reasons why I had to move. It wasn’t about pride and having to face everyone if I didn’t go through with it: it was simply that continuing my life as it had been was just not sustainable.
Now I am working on a major career change, which also comes with its share of stress and plenty entry points for fear to poke its head in to try to talk me out of it. I am more grounded and confident in my talents than I ever have been and it’s time for me to offer them with a whole, open heart. I don’t fear success (imposter syndrome) and I don’t fear rejection because it is all experience, which is what our souls need in this life.
Through all of this, I have maintained my yoga and meditation practice because it is essential for my physical fitness, as well as my mental and emotional health. I still do wall-supported handstands, though I don’t do them every day (at least for now) because moving all of those boxes and furniture really did a number on my wrists.
As for my day today, I started off on my meditation cushion and by the time I was done I looked out the window to find snow showers1
Luckily the snow didn’t hang around long enough to cause a lot of problems on the roads, so I treated myself to lunch at the Himalayan-Nepali restaurant I’ve been wanting to try (the Samosa Chaat is every bit as delicious as the reviews said it was!). And, of course, I did a self-portrait with headgear appropriate for the day.
It’s going to be fun to see what I come up with over the next 365 days!